


Psychogenic Fever

by kujojongup



Series: Random YoungUp Stuff [5]
Category: B.A.P
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Boys In Love, Drabble, Established Relationship, Fever, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sickfic, Tenderness, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, kinda??, soft, this is just so fucking soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-02
Updated: 2017-12-02
Packaged: 2019-02-09 12:14:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12887646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kujojongup/pseuds/kujojongup
Summary: Youngjae’s need for attention and affection surpasses the most intense exhaustion in the history of college students’ suffering. He can whine, whimper, sob, and strain, but he’s simply too stubborn to relent.One boy can only take so much, however, until he breaks.





	Psychogenic Fever

**Author's Note:**

> ayyyye ya boy is back with an incredibly odd, and honestly really short introduction to Milk Chocolate!  
> inspiration for this has been kinda dry considering idk what the fuck college is like and i just wanted an excuse to write sick and whiny jae  
> oops?
> 
> i hope y'all enjoy this regardless!!

The bustle of college life leaves Youngjae in a tousle. He’s a mess of tangled hair and unclipped nails, an unmade bed, and a head full of delirium and whiplash. Classes blend into naps which blend into silent library dates with Jongup that consist of minimal words. The time he has is confined to extra hours of sleep that shouldn’t even be considered extra, since they accumulate to the minimum amount he should be getting in the first place. Intertwining of fingers and soft kisses to the forehead have faded from his schedule entirely.

Youngjae is sick of it.

What's a relationship to him, if he can't give and receive love? He's touch-starved and frustrated. If he could have just one moment to kiss Jongup, or hold his hand, or lie with him in bed while holding each other close…he'd be the happiest man alive.

When exams end and a temporary break ensues, he forces himself to stay awake for hours until his boyfriend gets back to the dorm. The sting in his waterline is borderline excruciating and his body wants to fall apart like a crumbling cookie, but he endures it all to the point of tears just for the chance to kiss his boyfriend once.

Youngjae’s need for attention and affection surpasses the most intense exhaustion in the history of college students’ suffering. He can whine, whimper, sob, and strain, but he’s simply too stubborn to relent.

One boy can only take so much, however, until he breaks. He’s barely clinging onto a pillow and his consciousness when Jongup finally gets back.

He doesn’t even hear the click of the door and the gentle call of his name until the bed dips down next to him, jerking awake.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Jongup’s voice is distant, and through heavy lids lined with tears Youngjae can hardly differentiate his boyfriend's body, lying next to him, from the poster-covered wall. He barely even feels the hand that gently wipes the tears from his cheeks. “…Jae?”

Moving sluggishly on pure instinct, Youngjae snuggles closer to Jongup and lets his fatigue drag him under.

 

* * *

 

His head throbs.

His eyes feel stuck like glue.

His lips are chapped, and peeling them away from each other is agonizing.

His muscles are aching and tense.

His throat is as dry as a desert in summer solstice.

Youngjae feels like he’s in the city of Dis, and he’s condemned there for an eternity.

He wants permanent, void death more than ever, as a black abyss is better than the overcast of pain that rolls thunder and strikes lightning in his skull. His body burns and sweats, engulfed by the flames of hell that melt his body into the bed. Pain, pain, pain. All he can feel is agonizing pain as he tries to open his eyes without whimpering and agitating his throat. His panting desperation to breathe isn’t helping, though.

When he manages to blink his lash lines apart, the darkness is only slightly broken by dim marmalade through black curtains.

Moments after he gasps awake, lamp light flickers on with a click on his left side, compensating for the lacking sunset.

“Youngjae?” Jongup’s voice sounds from the direction of the light; tilting his head, Youngjae sees him kneeling next to bed, biting his lip. “Are you okay? You…you passed out for a day and- oh, uh, can you sit up?”

Lethargically, Youngjae attempts to lift his upper body. After a few seconds, Jongup stands and puts one hand on the older boy’s chest and the other under his back, slowly easing him up. 

It makes Youngjae unbearably dizzy, and his body sways lightly even when he sits still. His bed feels like a rickety roller coaster that no child or adult would ever dare get on, serving as more of a horror-story catalyst than a fun attraction.

“Open your mouth,” Jongup commands, reaching beyond his boyfriend’s vision. Youngjae complies, and a pill is carefully placed into this mouth. “This…might be hard, you need to swallow this, though…”

Tentatively, Jongup puts a glass of water to Youngjae’s lips, and uses his other hand to tilt his chin back.

Though the process is slow, the sensation of water and a pill dragging doing his throat is equal parts painful and relieving. On one hand, the temperature change is what he lusts after. On the other hand, the shock of the sudden change sends a shiver up his spine that shakes his brain in his skull, unapologetically slamming it left and right. Youngjae grabs the glass, despite how his arms feel like heavy stones, and takes heavy gulps as if he had being dying of dehydration.

Of course, it only results in him gasping for breath moment later.

The weight of Jongup’s hand leaves his back for a moment, only to be replaced by a stinging cold sensation against the back of his neck that makes him hiss.

“Sorry- I need to use ice packs to cool down because it cools down your blood—that’s what my mom said when I called her,” Jongup rambles. He pushes Youngjae back against the bed, slowly, while pressing another ice pack to his forehead. “Um, I told her what happened and she thinks you have psycho…genic fever. Yeah, that, um… medication doesn’t help it so I have to do this—but I gave you Advil because your head probably hurts…”

“I’m sorry,” Youngjae wheezes, staring at his boyfriend with puppy-like eyes.

“Oh, don’t worry! This isn’t a problem, really. I don’t mind taking care of you like this. I want to, actually—this is probably going to sound stupid but I thought you were in a coma or something, when you didn't wake up for half a day and your fever kept going up… My mom had to put up with me being worried on the phone for an entire hour, but I think I'm allowed to freak out like that, right?”

“Shhh…” Youngjae closes his eyes, lifting his wrist and twiddling his fingers. Taking the hint, Jongup grabs his hand and squeezes it reassuringly.

“Um, she said I probably wouldn’t need to call nine-one-one, but do I? Are you in any serious pain? I’m really worried, Jae, is this really bad? You slept for I think twenty-five hours, ah, that’s a lot, isn’t it? That’s not normal. Do you want to go to the hospital?”

“Just cuddles,” Youngjae mumbles, meeting Jongup’s concerned and panicked gaze with his own, tired and amused. “…And water.”

“I can’t cuddle you; your body temperature needs to drop back down.” The younger boy shakes his head, but looks just as dejected as his sick and needy boyfriend.

“But I want it~,” Youngjae whines, childlike. “You haven’t touched me in weeks, I…I just-”

“We’re on break now, it’s okay,” Jongup reassures, but irises display a silent apology. “…I can hold your hand? And pet your hair—so don’t worry!—I just can’t cuddle you. I’m sorry…when you get better we can cuddle again.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Promise?”

“Yes, Jae. I promise.”

“Can I go back to bed?”

“Yes, you can. Goodnight.”

“Mm…I love you…”

“And I love you.”

A kiss on the cheek, with Jongup’s tickling hair against his ticklish skin, is a lullaby that works like a charm.

 

* * *

 

 

It doesn't take Youngjae long to get better, maybe two days at most.

His parents gave him the obligatory pre-college lectures about dealing with stress and how to balance school and Jongup with their friends on the scales. They warned him of the dangers of stress disorders and strained relationships with others, as if they were experts in psychology. From how they spoke, you'd never be able to tell they were a mish-mash couple of a marine biologist and her doting assistant.

And yet they never told him that he could get psychogenic fever from his need for affection. He was going to chew them out for this.

"…Are you sure you're feeling better?"

"Yes, pup. For the sixtieth time: I feel fine."

When Jongup gets worried, he goes from hardly speaking unless spoken to, to being almost as incapable of shutting up as Daehyun. It isn't a bad thing per se, that Youngjae gets to hear his voice a lot. Simply, he just wants his boyfriend to stop being so anxious and just hold him.

"Maybe you should-"

"Baby~" he chuckles. He rolls over, sandwiching Jongup between him and the bed, and nuzzles his face in his neck. "Stop worrying, okay? My fever's down."

"You're still really warm," Jongup insists, wrapping his arms around Youngjae protectively. "At least let me open the window."

"It's already open, baby."

"Oh…right."

Without each other, they'd probably both be lost and confused.

"Thank you for taking care of me." Youngjae smiles, and presses a gentle kiss to Jongup's neck.

"Mhmm… I love you."

"And I. Love. You," he says, with yet more kisses between each word.

He really means it.

**Author's Note:**

> comments and kudos are fucking BLESSINGS MY DUDES JUST LETTIN YA KNOW
> 
> and my tumblr is gogomato.tumblr.com
> 
> honestly this wasn't my best though


End file.
